Alternative Media Pillows

'I'm a member of the non-traditional media.'

"He doesn't feel like bringing your newspaper, Howard."

Trial by Media

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

Occu-Pie Mars

In the Guru District

Squeezing the Free Press.

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

"National security adviser"

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'If only every year was an election year.'

If nobody had invented graphics

Donald Trump Playing Golf With Hair On Fire

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"See..? We told you there was nothing there..."

Gay Times...

Meet the Enemy

Cord cutter

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

Florida Governor, Rick Scott, cuts funding for rape victims.

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'