Alpaca Admirers Gifts

The three semi-wise men actually rode alpacas and carried knitted gifts of sweaters, sox and underwear to the arid desert village of Bethlehem...

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

"I didn't really start applying myself seriously until around the eighth life."

Elephant ass selfie.

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Table Of The Elephants

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

Yakety-Yak

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

"Is your dog friendly?"

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

"You finished with your peanuts?"

"When you said you wanted to bring a pet to work, I thought you meant a DOG!"

The sad case of the blind-men and the elephant.

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

Self driving car containing a baby elephant

"now let's try one without the tusks."

"They've been walking like this since they watched that documentary on elephants."

Elephant Trunk and Hose Pipe.

(Overachieving Dog) (Just get me the paper and let Mr. Rather go!)

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

Elephant in the Room