Airport T-Shirts

'Could you maybe fax a copy of this to my radiologist?'

'He's at that stage where he tends to wander.'

Phil would try anything to avoid paying hefty airport parking fees.

"Is the flight completely full, extremely full, or very full."

Compensation for Delayed Flights.

'Which one is winning?'

"Today's flight is overbooked. Is there someone who would accept a free travel voucher in return for teaching us how to correctly book a flight?"

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

"Sorry, but you're going to have to bag-check that."

Excess Baggage: You are old enough to remember when folks got all dressed up to travel.

'Our limo's here.'

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

'Attention, Flight 1362...In our customer Lounge we're showing a short film: 'Blooper Reels of Strip Searches' to help pass the time...'

A turkey on a baggage carousel

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

Baggage Claim

Carefree luggage.

"At this time boarding first will be all first class passengers, a.k.a. the more important people on this flight."

'He says he knows exactly where we're coming from.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

The World's Easiest Airport

"Early model of baggage claim"

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

Travelling

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

Airport