Airplane Buff Gifts

Santa's Near Miss

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

Atomic Bear: Part 22

Battery Lighthouse

Cross-country runners picking up water and spare batteries.

"It's a fairy simple procedure. We just take out the dead ones and put in two new ones."

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

"Take it. It's your bonus."

'It's a beautiful lighthouse. However, hauling the batteries up the stairs has taken its toll on my back.'

'I'm afraid it's gingivitis.'

'Could be worse, Bunny. At least we're not flying on one of those.'

"Two for Bethlehem, I assume you want a Virgin flight."

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

Mission accomplished.

"Let the epicurean feast commence."

Atomic Bear: Part 2

"Thank you earthlings, without your space junk we would be nothing."

'We've found the problem...'

'Do you have to bring your mother on every flight?'

'Honda has recalled the U.S. Sixth Fleet due to leaky sunroofs.'

'Termites!'

"We've reduced our emissions by 78%"

Flyaway Airlines. Check In. Do you have any luggage? Only carrion.

'Maybe you had the radar screen upside down and it was a plane...'

"On today's flight I've been informed of passengers with nut allergies, strong odor and lotion sensitivities, intolerances to fruit, veggies, meats. . ."

"Unfortunately, what we thought to be the black box turned out to be the navy blue box"

"Nice try Mrs Wimslow"

God and His copilot

'Welcome to crash-test flight 000.Please take your seat.'

'This is your captain speaking. Transatlantic airways has just been absorbed by Aero Argentina. Thus, instead of landing in London, we will touch down in Buenos Aires.'