Agreement Aficionado Gifts

'Okay, Simms, we have a verbal agreement, but I'd like my lawyer to check it.'

Speed Prenup

Shipping contract.

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"Call me?"

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Sitting in a tree

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

Driverless cars rage.

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

"What did you download at school today?"

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Valentine Day

'Yes, it computed the answer in a bilionth of a second and printed it instantly, but until I find my glasses...'

Bot Art: After da Vinci

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

Laughing Zone Ahead

"That's unanimous then - we don't know what to do."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"Of course I failed you — your essay was original and unique and obviously written by a human."

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

"I'm afraid I'll be replaced by a robot at work."

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

"When you say you're behind me 100%, do you mean base ten or binary?"