Age-conscious Explorer Pillows

'I wish you would stop calling my birthday a historical re-enactment!'

Albert & Myra - The End Story

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

You know you're getting up there in years when your birthday cake requires that extra box of candles....

"Meeting old relatives...is like peeking into our future."

Duel in a wheelchair.

'I couldn't remember your exact age.'

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

Pubertry

"Try to remember, you're not 70 any more."

"I must be getting old. I've forgotten why I came down the stairs."

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

"Ha! Now no one can call me 'old'! I just overtook a sports car!"

You Know You're Old When...

'They say ninety is the new eighty.'

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

"Would you want to drink from a fountain of youth?" "I'd settle for a fountain of middle age."

Climb to the moon on a tower of waste.

Millennials in the Year 2050...

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

'My doctor's given me the all-clear for our Reunion tour.'

'We've travelled tandem all our mrried life!'

'Are we nearly there yet?'

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

"75"

Retirement Age

"Here's the problem, I grabbed the wrong map. This isn't the Fountain of Youth. This is the Fountain of Middle Age."