Afterlife Debaters Pillows

"This is the part of religion we could do without."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Surgery up here is free!"

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"All we have left is standing room only."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

"But what if this is all there is?"

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

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"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

"Oh nooo, we can't skip church. Why, we'll just sleep when we're dead!"

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.

Gates of heaven

"Yes, this is heaven - but we need some source of funding, too."

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

Heaven

"You get a white robe, a halo, wings, and of course, free WIFI."

'Hold on, pal! Who's in control of the narrative here?'

"No, you're going to hell - but you're welcome to check out the gift shop."

Post-psychoanalysis

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'

Life on cloud 8

Door sign states: Reincarnation studies Come again ... and again.

"Just be happy you're getting in, worry about your hair later."