Advice Aficionados Pillows

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

'Honestly Nigel, your need for Special Advisers has got completely out of hand.'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

'In general, do the right thing.'

"No, I want to know the meaning of never calling your mother."

The Acme Agency: Dedicated to life, liberty and the pursuit of media exposure.

"If you see this as motherly advice, we have a whole new subject to explore."

'Have you considered getting a life-coach?'

'If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don't need advice.'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

"I hope you don't think I'm the kind who would hibernate on the first date."

"I'd like you to meet our director of scratch-and-sniff advertising."

The Surly Yoof

Fisherman: 'HOLY MACKEREL!'

'I understand night and day, but which came first?'

"Sinead?!"

'It's our fifth date, so I'll take a box of impatience.'

'The secret to staying in business, Wilson, is making something that's needed. Profit!'

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"There's someone here who says she has a word to the wise. Do we have anyone like that?"

"No darling, there's nothing magical in the air, I just farted"

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

'How do you think I ended up alone on the top of a mountain?'

'I asked you for one good reason why I should follow your advice, not six.'

"I'll give you some advice. When you're up to your nose, keep your mouth shut."

'My astrologer says one thing, my guru says another, my psychiatrist says something else - I don't know who to turn to anymore.'

QR tattoo.

Avoid boys who spend more on hair products than you do!

'This box usually yields one or two sensible suggestions,four or five stupid ideas,ten to twenty immoral suggestions and several hundred candy wrappers.'

'Oh yeah! My self help group knows a lot more than your psychiatrist. First of all, there's a lot more of them.'

"I know absolutely nothing about that subject, but I will give you my opinion."

Spice Up Your Conversation - Quote Yourself...

Joe's: 'Opinions on anything & everything!'