Adolescent Whisperer Gifts

'Just because you graduate from high school next year doesn't make us lame duck parents.'

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

Compression

Children's education

Mother threatening to gag her baby.

"Where are redactions when you need them?"

Science Dept...Entomology: 'Too bad humans don't spend their teen years in pupa like insects.'

Mother's Love

'We'll have him back on his feet and under yours in no time!'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

"Guess what. School is presented without commercial interruption."

A boy and his spin patrol.

"Tell the truth, Ezra. Does it look like he's being a more effective parent than me?"

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

"Do we have to use our inside voices through clenched teeth like you, Ms. Baker?"

Having It All

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

'That's o.k., Dugan - 'why do I even bother?' was a rhetorical question.'

'I know I can train them to be thoughtful productive citizens if I can ever get past sit.'

'I promise you we'll have him out of here real fast... we need the rest.'

'Sometimes patients become a little attached.'

'The boss has decided to spend more time with his children'

"Oh come now, darling. When I was your age, I felt different, too."

A pediatrician with children hanging off his arms

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

"This isn't bad. Ten per cent all A's."

"You're right... the babies are getting bigger."

Mind them while I go shopping and I'll give you 50 bucks extra!