Administrative Expert Gifts

Bureau of Red Tape

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

If I had sleeves, I'd roll them up...

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

Records?

Fed up with unnecessary bureaucracy?...what people don't appreciate is that if they don't fill out their C90D then how can we POSSIBLY know how many C90ds there ARE!

'Dear, the good doctor appears to have misplaced my file. Can you fax over your copy?'

In one ear/Out the other.

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

Attack of the 50 foot administrative professional.

"Your transfer comes with a bonus - 40 acres and a mule."

"Ms. Sweeney, take a letter, a memo, an email, a tweet, a text, never mind...I forgot what I was going to say."

'Always the wise guy.'

Acme Corp - In business since 1927 BG. 'The 'BG' stands for 'Before Greenspan'.'

"Yay, we have an agenda for today's meeting!"

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract..."

"OK, I think we're pretty much back to square one. You can stop now."

'Mr. Barnes has been riding his motorcycle, so he's a little behind on his paperwork. If you'll take a seat, he should be with you in a few hours.'

Excessive Paperwork

"Can you wangle me some parental leave?"

'How well you did it will determine whether it's 'as good as done', Father.'

List making as therapy.

'Good evening! I'm the Abduction Admin Consultant.'

"Your appointment's been cancelled. You took too long filling out those forms."

Master of Disaster

Oughta reply

"Cutting the budget is easy!...All you need to do is get rid of all that wasteful admin...what do they do!"

"People are always saying how stupid it is that the bst practitioners are always promoted and make poor managers....but I think that's complete rubbish...He was a lousy practitioner as well!"

"Have you read this report? Staff are spending 60% of their time on admin!"

After Hours Surgery.

It's only an email, what harm can it do?

'Somehow your medical records got faxed to a complete stranger. He has no idea what's wrong with you either.'

"I've made a decision, Pauline, We're putting everything off till tomorrow."