Adjustment Gifts

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

Moby Dick

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

The Three Kinds of People

"My parent's think I'm apathetic, but I don't care."

"Oh c'mon, Phil. Everyone knows we only stay together for the giant tortoise."

Bring Your Child To Work Day While You Work From Home

Glasses half full, half empty, half assed.

'Hopefully these sessions will help you to adjust to flying economy.'

"Sure makes a change from New York!"

Just Married

"Hey - that new Stephen King film is better than the book!"

"Actually, turns out my entire life can take place at 10%."

'Your glass is half full!'

"Is your glass half full with windfall profits, or half empty with a capital gains problem?"

'He is having trouble adjusting to the new normal.'

"You're in New York City now. You gotta lose the southern hospitality if you truly want to fit in."

Fresh out of school, new hire Justin Huffenberger is temporarily stunned and disoriented by the light at the end of the university tunnel.

Straightening up.

A pirate fishes using his hook.

"This is Pierre. He's our new 'Oui' man."

'Looks like Harold is having a hard time transitioning from freelancer to in-house.'

I made a resolution to have a more positive attitude, but god knows how long that's gonna last...

'On the contrary, your glass is half full.'

"So what did you do during the lockdown?"

You were right, I was silly to worry about some 'boy wonder' taking my job- the boss' daughter got it.

"How weird is it to be finally getting out again?"

'Would someone please remind me what our original intention was?'

"Correction. It's not a zombie apocalypse. They're simply adjusting to daylight savings time."