Addiction Management Gifts

'I gave up smoking - now I'm on 20 patches a day!'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

Screen Time vs Book Time

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

Bear who goes drinking instead of hibernating

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

'I see the rebranded mobile methadone project got underway.'

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

"Apparently, he had occasional sober periods."

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

'Since he stopped smoking, he doesn't know what to do with his mouth.'

Opioid Epidemic

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

Codependipity.

' I can't drink that..I'm a recovering alcoholic ! '

'You're meant to take off the old nicotine patches before putting on a new one!'

Don't you think you've had too many drinks?

'I hope you can reform his addiction to computers!'

A man tries to avoid going over the waterfall of alcohol dependence.

"Well, last year I kicked gambling. . . the odds are 3 to 1 the New Year will be a good one."

Lab Rat Rehab...

Breathe-aholics Anonymous: 'Hi, my name is Glen, and I've been clean and sober for over one minute.'

"Refresh my memory-why do we meet once a week?"

'I'd like to quit drinking, but it's all I KNOW!'

Man covered in patches - "That's the worst smoking habit I've ever seen."

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.