Active Parents Pillows

'You can't start them exercising too early.'

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

Exercising

"Entering Minivan Territory: Healthy Snacks Strictly Enforced

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

Skateboard

'Hey Dad, Mom's got a new hobby...still life painting...er, Dad?'

Antiwar Democrats Get Tough

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after 3 children all day"

Baby Footballer

'How did our summer vacation turn intoa summer job??'

"Can I help it if dirt is attracted to me?"

"I think we need to spend more time with the children...how many have we got?"

'It's your husband. The baby won't burp for him.'

'When I want to watch a realistic comedy about a working mom, I'll look in the mirror.'

Where did Mommy go? Turtle Peekaboo.

"Sleep? Who needs sleep? It's time to PARTAY!"

"Lemme guess: You forgot the basil Mom asked for, and my ice cream is in your briefcase?"

"Look what I found in the garage! My old music speakers!"

"Our training on managing a work life balance is running late so you'll need to get someone to pick your kids up."

'Congratulations. It's a latch key kid.'

"Tough time getting out of the house this morning?"

'Sorry dear, I have to go straight to work tomorrow.'

'Alert the troops I'm going back to work.'

"I'm not sure our family's ready for kombucha, hon."

"Dr. Behan?! Congratulations! It's a Boy!!!"

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

"Daddy, I'm all grown up now, and I'm leaving to start a life of my own."

"We should decide now whose career will suffer more once I give birth."

"It's either "Bring your kid to work" day or it's "Drop of handbag in kindergarten" day today?"

'Another day, another dollar.'

Things Your Mother Would Never Let You Do Olympic Games

Number of times your kids will wake in the night/Amount you have to do tomorrow