Accountability Advocates Pillows

Parole officer: Hanging in and hanging out.

Under new blame.

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

Working in a blame culture?

"No word from the company – but, it's clear that this is a major spill."

Johnson and Johnson will pay 572 million for Opioids

BP is compensating those affected by the black tide in Gulf of Mexico...

Investigating Yourself

Wait Brian! You forgot the little Airbus chapter!

Facebook in Crisis

"You don't need pronouns in your presentation. That's what finger-pointing is for."

'Naughty, nice, nice, nice, naughty, nice. This you call a business plan?'

'You'll notice on my resume that nothing has ever been my fault.'

Owning your mistakes at work shows that you hold yourself accountable, and builds trust and credibility.

"But if I don't know the corporate values then I'm not accountable to them."

'Ms Simpson? Get me the Scapegoat du Jour.'

'Management can't avoid responsibility for poor patient care...I want to tender my resignation!'

Making Amends: I haven't harrassed anyone in weeks....My new career: I'll be a secretary....to a female executive. Women can harass em all they life. I sentence myself to house arrest for 30 days, make that 90 days.

Good Enough

Civilian Oversight

'The new business plan is the same as the old business plan except that, due to layoffs, we have less scapegoats to blame in case of failure.'

"We've got a new customer, Eddy: run a couple of kegs over to the Supreme Court."

Jobless Recovery

'It's not our fault.'

Cuz I Was Scared

Be prepared to issue a public whoopsie.

"Who do I hold accountable if you miss the deadline? Any next of kin?"

"Why do you call it a thyroid problem when it's been giving me an excuse for the 20 pounds I gained this year?"

"That's the danger of mono tasking...you're too easily held accountable."

A Breakdown in Process

'Stick to your diet or our talking scale will rat you out!'

United States Senate Ethics Committee - All members being investigated.

Nassar is caught while MSU officials remain.

'I'm a man of my word! Once I've made a wrong decision, I stick to it!'

"No, it's still perjury, we don't make exceptions for 'white lies'."