Academic Socializer T-Shirts

Cliques Amongst Mathematicians.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

Quiz Night...

'Looks like everyone has FINALLY gone home.'

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

Communication

"Would you like to be notified by text when I'm bored and want to go home?"

"I finally lost a few ounces with my activity tracker. I took it off."

'I gained many useful leads, renewed relationships with various potential customers and established a number of contacts...'

The Devil's advocaat.

Getting old...

"I gotta log off, guys - I just encountered some malicious spyware."

"Oh, no thank you. I’m rumaki-free."

'She's spring cleaning and you?'

'I think it's finally accurate to say that literally everyone is misusing the word 'literally'.'

"I'm Generation Z. Nice to meet you."

Will Make You Sick So You Can Go Home.

'I wish my wife would stop playing mind games with me. I'm tired of losing.'

"Every bar has its obnoxious drunk."

"This one looks promising... likes sushi, long winter nights and chilling out in large groups."

"It can never work out between us. You're selfie, Instagram, and twitter shy."

It's called 'Pretentious.' It tastes like crap, but it's $100 per bottle!

"I moved here just six months ago and already I'm part of the local color."

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

"David! It's only trendy to drink beer straight from the bottle!"

"I've learned not to listen to critics who are right about me."

Running on Empty

Wasn't sure why, or even what it meant, but sometimes he just needed to make his presence felt.

'Mrs Gridlington doesn't like being referred to as 'duck' or 'dearie'...so I just call her 'the old trout'!'

Military Hospital.

'I'm going to have a few drinks with the guys...don't wait up for me.'

Bar. Don’t apologize for calling me a porpoise … Heck, I thought you were a crocodile!

'I'm actually sick enough to have called in, but who wants to miss a Friday at work'