Academic Pressure Analyst Gifts

4 Great Ways to Fail

An Archeologic Dig

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

Regardless children just want to fit in.

A boy and his spin patrol.

New dunce caps

Dr. Darrin found her peer review process unnerving.

"Improve your geography results, Perkins or you're history!"

'See, this is proof that your criticism of our educational system is right on!'

"It's easy. The first step is to entirely change who you are."

"My dad doesn't nag me enough about going to college."

Test Therapy

'I'm worried that if I study too hard, I couldn end up being a teacher.'

"I feel sorry for kids these days - they're always being tested for something"

'You are 14st 3lb..But then, you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.'

"While it's true most of my grades have gone down, most were on low volume."

'This note from your teacher says you're doing great for a six year old. Doesn't she know you're fifteen?'

'May I be excused? The pressure is getting to me.'

Students getting marked letter grades on foreheads. 'It's the beginning of another marking period at Highland Community Schools.'

"Is that Baldo's 'scary Halloween' face?"

'Why can't my mother be more like my grandmother?'

High water pressure

'C'mon! Just step on treble twenty once, and you'll be in the gang!'

"So what if he paid a classmate to do his homework – it was his own allowance."

"Okay - now that the paramedic is here with the defibrillator and smelling salts. . ."

"I was finally able to capture all my angst in writing. Then it became a required college textbook. Now, I have brand new angst."CS561041

Royal Wedding Mania

'As the principal, you'd be darn sure I'd know if there were any grade inflations going on around here.'

"Yes, our students complain about spending thousands on our bogus online programs. They paid for a real world education and that's what we gave them."

'Is there any way I can make up fot my SAT scores by doing community service!?'

"You're the reason nations fail."

'Perhaps the letter grading system needs to be overhauled.'