Absurdity Appreciator Pillows

Sisyphus' baseball game

"Great! O.K., this time I want you to sound taller, and let me hear a little more hair."

Elevator buttons: Up, Down, All the above, None of the above.

'Please turn it down - Daddy's trying to do your homework.'

"And once you've achieved your 25% improvement in client satisfaction surveys, we need you to solve the problem of global warming,third world poverty and cold toast."

'Today's agenda - 1:Emerge, 2:Eat, 3:Mate, 4:Die.'

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'Have you ever tried pushing a piece of string?.'

The eulogy was beautiful, although the question-answer period was rather odd.

Bob's revelation that the key to putting things in proper perspective is timing...

How is your terror today

"It`s a sign of things to come."

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'I don't have time to explain. Just call the super and tell him the elevator's stuck.'

'What did you do in the drugs war daddy'

'Wait for me!'

'...How can I trust you to handle multimillion-dollar accounts if you can't even spin a basketball on your fingertip?'

'I'm all ears.'

Waterskier on ski slope.

"We rendezvous at 0600 hours. Wear this so I'll recognize you"

'How long has what been going on?'

"I keep having this terrible nightmare, that I'm really a legal secretary with a Wagner fixation."

"Hello, department of pointless endeavors and redundant futility."

Channel rail link.

Lost And Found

"I've transferred all my vacation time into absurdly long coffee breaks."

'Last night I dreamed that I had six-pack abs... Then I woke up screaming.'

Lake Skater

Shopping trolleys can be found anywhere...

Apple-to-Orange Adapter

"The food situation is good, but I'm afraid we've run out of magnets."

'Next on News 7...GM offers to bail out the government in the event of a shutdown...'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

Information: You are a tourist.

'Oh boy, hot tubs!'