Absurd List Lover Pillows

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Extreme Sisyphus

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

A private jet takes off

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

"Now you can send it."

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"Hey look, my To Do list! I haven't been able to find this for weeks!"

"I'm making a list of everything we have to do before we go away so we can freak out in some kind of order."

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

"I had no idea life could be so complicated."

'I predict that the next big trend will be spontaneous non-existence.'

Eugene Ionesco

Operation.

UFO and snowman

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

Baseball.

Breakfast surreal.

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

'It does data processing, word processing and list processing. Get me some data, some words and some lists.'

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

Salome on Settle (also called Maitresse d'Orchestre) - intended for book but suppressed

Bucket List