Absurd Animal Lover Pillows

Giraffe using a snorkel while fishing.

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

Extreme Sisyphus

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

'I predict that the next big trend will be spontaneous non-existence.'

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

"Is it OK if I turn the humidifier up a bit?"

A Centaur Taking A Shower

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

"I've never known a child like him. He's always finding things."

PODs Venn Diagram

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

"Can I call you back? I'm right in the middle of something."

'Aren't you glad we gave her a rabies vaccination this year?'

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Stale Ostrich Egg Throwers

"Can you suggest a nice Bordeaux that will complement the squirrel-infused manure?"

"Sorry, dude. You've been voted out of the pack!"

Sea Monster Gabs Desert Island

'How would you describe yourself. . . a leader or a follower.'