Zoolinguist Gifts

'What did you think I meant when I said I wanted to go clubbing?'

Polly txt speak

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"Sign my yearbook?"

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Farm Humor.

The Worm Charmer

"The hyenas started it."

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'Everybody has to change to compete.'

God's Subcontractors

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"He didn't do anything, Gregory. This is a zoo"

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

"He is throwing another of his 'hissy fits' again!"

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.