Zookeeping Pillows

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

Vet holding an umbrella under a giarffe to avoid getting urinated on

'You're kinky, aren't you, Samuel?'

'Stop touching me.'

"Don't worry, I never get the jokes either, but if you clap your flippers, he'll throw you a fish..."

'Careful, he bites.'

'What's wrong with the kangaroo?'

'Hey, I didn't know they had kiddish at the zoo!'

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

Mopping up outside the reptile house...

Chameleon

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

City Zoo: Day Care

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

Seagiraffes

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

A mother and baby elephant

"Look, a bug!"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"Be kind"

"We’re a lending aquarium."

"This never happened."

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

Litter Tray Training

"I've told you before one at each end!"

'I am so proud: My kids are finally fighting all the time!'

'Boy, if you'd just stop roaming around, it would be easier to find you...'

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'