Zen Equestrian Pillows

'I thought you were getting alternative therapy today...'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

Turmoil change.

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

I am one with stupid.

"Exactly what is this 'nothing' I've been hearing so much about?"

"My mental ink pen ran dry.

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

Working from Om

'... Of course, once you actually achieve enlightenment, it all gets a bit boring.'

'OK, Now let's see your Downward Dog'.'

Don't laugh. It's added three points to his scores.

I kid you not, if he calls me 'grasshopper' one more time, I'm cleaning his clock.

Working from OM

Rin Tin Zen.

Meditating on a 4th for golf!

"I'm in the 56-year intensive program, all meals included."

'If I could just speed this up a little, I'd be out of here in thirty years or so.'

Traffic Sign Haiku

'So? -- What could be more Zen than empty calories?'