Youthful Ponderers Gifts

"You know, we're not getting any younger...I mean, pretty soon, we'll both be 16."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

Multi-Generational Books

Playground reputation.

"It's quiet in here. I suppose it's off the popular tourist route!"

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

'If Aunt Arctica is on the bottom of the world, does that mean Uncle Artica is on top of the world?'

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

'The position calls for a mature person with young ideas.'

'According to this stop watch I'm not growing up fast enough.'

"What's it like to be the parent of a nonhuman?"

'When will it be o.k. to feel irrationally exuberant again?'

'My problems seem small to you because you're so darn BIG'

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

'Is this really where we wanted to be at this stage of our lives?'

"If you never date a prediction it can't be proved wrong."

Your weight and fortune. What you'll weigh now...what you'll weigh 10 years from now.

"I'm diagnosing a conflict of interest . . . your body knows how old you are, but your mind refuses to believe it."

"How did people waste time before computers?"

"When I was growing up, my parents only ever gave me two choices for everything I did: The carrot or the stick..."

All Metamorphosed And No Place To Go.

"We think he needs more individual neglect."

'If birds reproduce by laying eggs, what's this BIRDSEED stuff all about?'

'I don't want to play house... I want to play hard-to-get.'

'...I just get nervous about opening up and talking about it.'

"You awake?"

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

'...do I want to risk putting up with someone like me?'

'Where did we go wrong...?'

Zebra Crossing

'If fifty is the new seventy, when is the new dead?'

'He's beginning to notice girls.'

'Life isn't fair. Just when girls get interesting, they get taller than us.'

Sermon: '...and on the eighth day he created creationists.'

'And to think that only this morning we were just so much Flotsam and Jetsam on the sea of life.'