Young Toy Caretakers T-Shirts

'I'd like to come out and play but I can't find a sitter.'

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Santa Claus's Mail

Build your very own conflict of interest!

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

That one has all the batteries!

"That'll be five bucks."

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

"Werewolves of London..."

Rocking Horse

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

'How's my rabbit settling into his new home? He's still a bit jumpy!'

'Off hand I'd say she needs re-stuffing.'

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

Slinky Cow World

"It's his emotional support animal."

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

Juniors Baby Sitting Service.

One!

Childlike love

"If we play house, Timmy, we can't live with my parents because..."

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

Jack in the box on strike.

What can I play?

Inaction Figure

Remote Control Duck

Typical bored kid of the New Millennium

Help me!

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"