Young Athletes Gifts

"I am standing up straight."

Multisports

Gym Kids

Football Fans

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

The trauma of losing.

"I AM at my usual position."

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

Exercising

Children jumping onto mattress in PE.

The team video didn't spotlight my talents. I've hired my own film crew. They'll showcase my skills so college recruiters can see my strengths. Wow! How can the director pack so much into one little video? Great point! Daddy? Tell Steven Spielberg we're going feature length. Nice save!

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

Runt! You'll never make the team. We'll see! You can't even tie your shoelace! Great technique!

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

'Now then you two, you can't both be Australia - one of you has to be England!'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

The young Michael Phelps: 'Just another four laps and I'll get out!'

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

A boy with a football

"I've never been into the other team's end... what's it like?"

'The game was called off on account of rain.'

Our coaches are from top college teams. Questions. Why aren't you in training? Sports Camp. Rotator cuff injury. Concussion. Back surgery. Counselor. Ok, campers. Let's show them what you've got! Excellent health insurance card representation!

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

Student to kid: 'School first, then Mount Everest.'

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

'I'm the new kid on the team. Where's my signing bonus?'

'I don't mind being sent off Sir - but not during the warm-up!'