Yo-yo Wizard Pillows

'The story of how I invented the yo-yo is a classic tale of highs, lows, highs, lows...'

"Home depot."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

Newt sale

Food deliverer's baby.

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

"Victims of out-sorcery."

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

Yo Yo Tricks.

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

"I'd just as soon it wasn't cut into those funny little pieces, if you don't mind."

"The madness started with the cow and spread to the others."

'Stop annoying the dog Andrew!'

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

"They grow up so slow."

'Have no fear - I'll have the project completed for you in no time.'

Millennials in the Year 2050...

"Wait. Let me have one more try."

'Please stop...it reminds me too much of the markets.'

'Hmm, wrong bottle. I guess THIS one must've been the Elixir of Death...'