Yiddish Enthusiast Gifts

"Kfetch!"

"Kfetch!"

Our Lady of Perpetual Kvetching

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

Oymoticons

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Did you find our menorah?

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"'Frankenstein' is Jewish. I'm Irish on my mother's side because she was green, and an 'O' Houligan'..."

'Forty years! How come that other guy got away with forty days and forty nights?'

Jewish man walks into a restaurant called 'Oy Sushi'.

Biblical Jewish Medical Ethics

The Exobus

"In 200 cubits, right-turn, then stay on the current road..."

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

I don't get why ladies find you so charming, and me so boring. Simple projection. Believe she finds you charming because you're wittier and more mysterious than she is. She'll sense you're a challenge. Suddenly she'll make anything you say conform to that assumption. So I just Jedi mind-trick them? Maybe not ANYthing.

"May your year be pear-fect."

"Together we are superspreaders of light!"

Safer Torah

'We were kind of hoping to let our CONSCIENCE be our guide.'

'I create them, I liberate them from Egypt, I give them manna, and now they want me to make the sun stand still!'

Torah-nosaurus Rex

"I don't care if it's his new year, that's my honey!"

"That's just sick."

Lighting Chanukah candles was a matter of seconds for Puff the Magic Dragon

'No, you don't get to pick one from each column!'

Snowboy becomes a Snowman.

Shimon Peres last embrace...

Existential Dreidel

Amos Oz

Lulav and Etrog Fencing

Bubbie's parrot