Yardwork Fanatic Pillows

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Gardener

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

The Last Leaf

"He loves his leaf blower."

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

Beginning Yarder.

"Want to impress me with that hammer? Try using it to fix a few things around here."

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

Your Home Remodel Team

"It's a miracle I was able to build this desk all by myself. I'm not so handy."

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

A man raking his lawn watches as the leaves climb back into the trees.

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Wallpapering with Nails

"When we remodeled, we decided to go with the granite countertop."

"You see a bunny rabbit in the clouds. I see mom telling me to mow the lawn."

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"How did you get him to do housework?"

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

"They've got insulation to die for!"

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

House Painter gets stuck to the ceiling.

"Jeepers, what happened to your power cord?"

"Buying the largest TV on the market was a good idea. Mounting it was not."

"You've not used a chainsaw before have you?"

"I've fixed the shelf, darling."