Yard Sale Treasure Hunter Pillows

"I'd like to buy your garage but I don't know how I would carry it."

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

The Dubloon Stops Here

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"I think I just solved my cash flow problem."

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

That's supposed to say garage sale!

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

"There's more inside."

Pirate

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Yard Sale

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

"Did you check the little patch of grass by the swing set?"

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

Estate Sale! All the stuff my kids said they don't want to inherit.

'It says right here on the package, Ed, 'avoid any direct contact with skin'!'

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"

"But the real treasure is spending time with friends."

Archaeologists discover a football