Xmas Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Main floor, aisle six, ladies' scarves. Shopper down."

A millipede hanging up his Christmas stockings.

'I'm returning 12 drummers, 11 pipers, 10 lords, 9 ladies, 8 maids, 7 swans, 6 geese, 5 gold rings, 4 calling birds, 3 french hens, 2 turtle doves and 1 partridge. They're on your loading dock. Here's my receipt.'

"We all go a bit crackers over Christmas, just try to pull yourself together."

'This? It's just someone who was waiting in the queue with us!'

"Gold ended the day on a new high, while frankincense and myrrh both opened well but faded as the markets closed."

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Christmas Tree

'He lives for his holidays.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"Home depot."

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

Panettone

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

Horn of Leftovers

"I don't believe in you!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

"I have no toys just yet. I have a concept of a plan for toys...toys like no one has ever seen before."

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Happy Turkey Day!

Children's Dreams on Christmas Eve

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

"No, you definitely wouldn't get Christmas Eve off."