Writers Pillows

The Best of Times/The Worst of Times

"It's good....but I know these people...they're gonna want specifics!"

North American Newspaper Industry.

'I realize that you're upset that Oprah hasn't reviewed your new book on her show. But you are on MY show, so why don't you tell us what inspired you to write 'Overcoming Disappointment and Resentment.''

'I've invented copyright.'

'So you're saying your autobiography has eight sequels?'

Campaign for Plain English

Arthur Schopenhauer

"It's about a whale called Moby Richard."

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

Henrik Ibsen,

"Oh, he's not a writer - he's a conceptual artist."

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

"I like it, but let's replace the 'evolved from apes' bit with something more plausible - like a talking snake."

Learn to Be a Critic In The Privacy Of Your Own Home With The Apex Correspondence School Of Criticism!

'Do you have any books by writers?'

I think in order to be historically accurate you're meant to remove the quill from the bird BEFORE you start trying to write with it!

'He's been at it for six months, and he still can't think of a pseudonym.'

'He's been very lucky - itstarted off as a suicide note!'

Author signing: Meet the plagiarist.

'I haven't had so much as a hug since she took up blogging.'

'...and the axe murderer lived happy ever after...'

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

Litterary Dogs.

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

A Trend In Children's Literature Is Discerned

'Of course he answered you with a form letter -- you expect rock stars to know how to write?'

'The book's a belter we just don't think you're sufficiently good-looking for it to sell.'

"I can't wait to meet the author! He has such an amazing understanding of children!"

"Morning, sir. We've received reports that you've been wielding an inappropriate attitude without a permit."

Pen

"I'm upset because there's no cartoon in your newspaper that I'm upset about and that I could cancel the subscription for! That's why I cancel my subscription!"

Salman Rushdie

Never use a cookbook written by a mystery book author. You never know how things will turn out!

"During difficult times people often reach out to find new sources of entertainment."