World's Fair-scale Scholar T-Shirts

"It's one of life's great rules...do something great once and you'll hear about it forever. Do something great all the time and you're just another overachieving brainiac."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

K9 Literati

The Last upper: Novus Ordo Style

'Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study.'

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

"I don't know why we try so hard to get the right answers. There isn't even a prize."

"Do I need to know this stuff to get into medical school?"

'This is going really well. I did a great job organizing this lecture.'

"On the contrary. I think the Carribbean countries have a great many education practices that are worth studying."

What your guitar says about you.

'There is NO way I can perform under that kind of pressure!'

"If you were truly blessed by genius, it wouldn't end there, believe you me!"

Graduate of 2021

"I got an A+ on my math test! I'm updating my resume."

"I went to college knowing I wanted to be an astronaut. My parents had only a third-grade education. But they were good teachers. They taught me the importance of hard work...of perseverance...of not being afraid to dream."

"Along with 'Antimatter,' and 'Dark Matter,' we've recently discovered the existence of 'Doesn't Matter,' which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever."

"I can't wait to get home and insult my parents from a position of authority."

'Mrs. Wayne was so excited about getting her masters in physical science, she took a quantum leap!'

The unknown soldier: war grave.

You're in the Engineering Quad, Just Back Away Slowly and Find the Humanities Quad.

"What's come over Heisenberg? He seems to be certain about everything these days."

'Best way I know to decide who gets the research position.'

Various sporting officials think to themselves: '4 years at West Point for this'...'5 years at MIT for this'...'6 years at Julliard for this.'

"This is getting out of hand! Every time I drive up to the school, Gracie starts crying!"

"I had that nightmare where I’m in class, a final paper is due, and I forgot to eat it."

History Doesn't Repeat Itself

String theory class

'I'd give that teacher a piece of my mind if I could spare it.'

"Enjoy your rain!"

'I'm majoring in 'Business' with a minor in 'None Of Your Business.''

"You just graduated from the best, most fun school ever! Nice!"

I'm doing much better since I outsourced my homework overseas.

President Harry Truman