World Record Watcher T-Shirts

Guess what he is in the guinness book of records.

Humans...What is their purpose?

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

'As far as clock watching goes, you take the biscuit.'

World Production.

"Wow - Heavy, man"

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

"AI"

"Trump vs Biden. Chiefs vs 49ers. On the brink of war with Iran. Didn't we do this all in 2020?"

"Yes, if that towel weighs 25 lbs that would explain the reading."

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

'Too many people in our state are overweight, Senator. They want fat-free pork.'

"I thought you said I needed to get some 'extra size'."

'Take one of these diet pills every time you regain consciousness.'

Earth and the Coronavirus

War 2023

Woman Weighing Herself on Two Scales.

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

The Problem with World Population Growth

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

'How long has it been shaking like a bowl full of jelly when you laugh?'

'I'm putting you on a 'whatever tastes good, don't eat it' diet.'

'Good. Then there's no reason to stay on this diet any longer.'

Scales

Half a house is better than none.

Frankly, it’s too grim for a comedy, and too silly for a tragedy.

Fat man on scales.

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

Man has a seatbelt and 'calm down tablets' to watch the world news.

'You strap it on and it monitors your eating habits -- it's called the 'Fudgebuster.''

"Here's what went wrong today."

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

Chinese Communist Party at 100

What will happen in the world