World Record Aspirants Gifts

First Upright Piano Pulled to the South Pole.

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

"Another world record - it must be faster water."

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

I think the speed grazing record is in the bag!

'...And to faithfully execute the duties of Emperor of the United States of Newt...'

Origins of the 'Beard Of Bees'.

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

Guess what he is in the guinness book of records.

OWZAT...The beer-mat-flipping champion sets a new world record!

Competitions.

"Working an 80 hour week never did me any harm!"

'Next time up, I'm calling my shot: I'm pointing to the catcher's mitt.'

'I wanna be a hockey goalkeeper.'

"With symptoms like yours, you could be the next Batman!"

'He wants to be a footballer.'

"Ugh . . . nevermind."

'Hello, Guinness Book of Records, what's the longest recorded sulk?'

"Winning isn't the only thing, Junior. It's how much money you can get in a pro contract."