World Cup Fandom Pillows

"I know, it's hideous! But I did a hell of a lot of sky punching during the World Cup and now I'm stuck with it."

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

If nobody had invented graphics

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

Football

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

Raheem Sterling

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Big screen TV.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

Kenny Dalglish

"All of a dither as per usual!"

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

Mohamed Salah

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'