Workplace Wizards Pillows

'To enable them to provide the service we require the procurement team have submitted a request for seven wands, a crystal ball and a time machine...'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"We only got six days of funding."

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"Lovely dovetail."

Desk trays - 'In', 'Out', and 'It depends'.

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

"It's my intelligence, talent and hard work that have got me to the top."

Waiting for retirement.

Stationery Shop

"I know you think this sort of thing is nonsense sir, and I hate to prove you wrong. But according to my crystal ball, you're not going to give me the raise I'm about to ask for."

Research and Development: Now, Never.

"What are you doing? It's Halloween. Not leaving your deliveries to the last minute this year?"

Targets.

'Should be home soon. I'm just clearing away the usual paperwork.'

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

In - Out - Pending.

"The team needs LEADERSHIP, anyone have a view on that?"

'My multi-tasking turned into faulty-tasking.'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."

Tie Rolls

"Gosh, 'inept' seems so harsh. Personally, I prefer the term 'productivity-challenged!'"

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

Man with post it note

The Move.

"Wentworth, could I take another look at that reorganization plan?"