Workplace Revolutionary Pillows

'Your proposal is innovative. Unfortunately we won't be able to use it because we've never tried something like that before.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

37 years in the same position.

"How's your insomnia?" "Bad, I can't even fall sleep during meetings."

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'What's wrong now?'

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

'Yes, can I help you?'

"Wake up Thomas, it's not 2020. There's no Zoom camera to turn off to hide yourself."

"The boss likes people with strong convictions. You're hired."

'The boss put his picture up to enspire us. But it just isn't having that effect on me.'

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'