Workplace Agility Gifts

"I'm glad you felt able to get that off your chest...now could we discuss next year's targets?"

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

Trays on desk read, 'Here', 'There' and, 'Neither here nor there.'

'These are job perks.'

Agility God

'You must be fast, agile and unflappable! Having fun just got serious ponies....welcome to gymkhana!

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

Please bring me a few sharpened pencils and some lucrative business.

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

'Should be home soon. I'm just clearing away the usual paperwork.'

"I was just finishing up some spring cleaning."

'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'

"We only got up to three 'whys' and a 'what the hell'."

'I think I found the bottleneck, Boss.'

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

Project Manager Showdown

"Sorry, coffee is delivered by a union shop and you banned all things union."

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"I don't know why people go on about the problem of 'stress'."

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

"OK Hunter. Go join the 'non-verbal criticism skills' seminar!"

'Staff Recommendations Inc.'

Miss Wilkins, I need you to pop in and hang up my phone for me again.

'Good news! The boss called me in - I'm one of his people.'

Communicating with clients without using buzzwords posed a challenge for the consultants.

"Well that email could have been a meeting."

R. Gelfin - The buck stops here, then gets buried in his pile.

Could we organise another meeting to think about rationalising our meetings

Day One, NASA

'I discovered just as much work gets done when you're not there.'