Workforce Whisperer Pillows

'Ever have one of those days when you needed a prod to get you going?'

"I think we might already have lost the next set of graduates, they don't see us offering a career path..."

"When you read up on it you realise how complicated management is."

'Get up off your backsides and get to work.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

Critisize your weight.

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

That endless instant between initial eye contact and conscious recognition.

"Love your feng shui!"

"I'm really great thanks. The boss loves my ideas, he says I'm ahead of my time!" "Hi John, how are you? Good meeting?"

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"On Monday, they will introduce a new office layout and you'll be near Judy, who isn't good at sharing her charger. . ."

"Tell the employees that from now I want them to do as I say, not as I do."

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

'I see you have a stock market/body connection.'

'I understand yours is a highly coveted position in this company.'

"Blimey, he's not the sharpest tool in the box, is he?"

"You say there's a dip in the market?"

'Boy, are the markets getting sensitive, anymore.'

Cellular Plan

'Excellent! Our tests confirm that the average shareholder falls asleep by page 9 of the 10-K. Place the notice of the IRS audit on page 10.'

'I think our filing system is a little too obvious.'

"I can't keep giving you stock tips. The SEC has been making 'insider trading' inquiries."

'In Case of Swarm, Break Glass.'

"For gosh sakes, Mike! Will you please quit interrupting me while I eavesdrop on Mary's gossipy remarks to Bill during Jean's important presentation?"

"I keep getting the feeling I’m being watched."

'I've started an Employee Recognition Program. I know who you are.'

"Our manager is young enough to have fresh new ideas!"

'It has been brought to my attention that some of us are not working at maximum efficiency.'