Workflow Worrier Pillows

"Crap in" and "crap out"

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

I.T. Fear

Mental Wellness Center. Some folks coming here are working on multiple issues. Earlier, I saw a germaphobe with a fear of flying. Using an airplane bathroom must be completely out of the question! There's a narcissist with math anxiety and a fear of public speaking. He hopes one day he can stand in front of a large audience and count all the wonderful qualities he believes he has. And that guy has claustrophobia combined with a fear of success. Looks like he's going through a rough period

Nervous Oral Testing

'It's new from British Telecom...a telephone ignoring machine.'

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

'But do you realize what this report cart will do to my self-esteem?'

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

"Before I say, I do. Just let me run those vows past my best lawyer."

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

"How was your day?"

A usual day.

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"You don't have to say anthing, but anything you do say may later be used in court by a divorce lawyer."

"Oh, for crying out loud, Lou... just go in the water!"

"But why not be happy about all the diseases you don't have?"

"What do you mean 'no way'?"

'He heard the question, Reverend. He's sleeping on it.'

"If you're so worried about the effect of your mobile phone on your sperm count maybe you should just use it less!"

Concern Chart

"I know there's safety in numbers, but I suffer from enochlophobia: Can you help me?"

'If all the red warning lights come on, it means meltdown, so get out of the car fast!'

'He spent yesterday being briefed on the threats from a cyber attack...'

'You worry too much. Next time something goes wrong, try blaming someone else.'

"The boss complimented Bob today... but now he's afraid if he talks to him again he'll say something stupid and ruin it!"

"Hurry up with that cork!"

It was a bad day for Mr Effervescent

'No, I've never yet broken any swimming records, why do you ask?'

A word to the wise. At this morning's meeting you were referred to as the 'the bottleneck'.

I didn't experience any of the side effects listed in the enclosed literature. Should I be concerned?'