Workaholic Club Gifts

"The only thing worse than being unemployed is having a job."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

Man running in a hamster wheel

'I want to empower you to fulfill your potential! If you can work 16 hours today, then your 20-hours shift tomorrow should really elevate your self-esteem'!

'When I took this job, I had no idea how much it would cut into my quality, family texting time.'

Stresses Can Have a Motivating Effect...If They Don't Kill You!

Computer monitor for a head.

"National Metaphor Day by the looks of it."

'I didn't come in to hear that I'm burning the candle at both ends. I came for more wax.'

'What - no internet? No USB ports? No socket for the coffee machine? No phone? Are you crazy? My husband was a very important CEO!'

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'

"I need to clone myself."

'I'm thinking of cutting my hours down to 24/7."

Man on beach blowing up an inflatable office.

Sisyphus Gets a Desk Job.

'Are you just back from work or on your way to the office?'

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"That can't be right. How'd you work 15 hours in on day?"

'Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until next Monday?'

'We got you a bigger desk. With all the work we'll be dumping on you, you'll be needing it.'

Desk trays: The Good - The Bad - The Ugly

Night-shift entrance

"Alan had to work all night on his presentation....this is what 17 espressos does to him."

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

"A laptop has been installed in each rest room stall."

Work avalanche

'I'm the CEO of a large corporation. Of course my cough is productive. Everything I do is productive.'