Wordsmithing Wonder Pillows

I used to only get writer's block, but it has morphed into copyright block too.

Korney Ivanovich Chukovsky

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

Reading my Critics

"My preferred pronoun is they."

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

"Brilliant cover letter, lousy résumé."

"Your appendix is fine. It's your glossary I'm worried about."

'No spell-check?? And you call this HEAVEN??'

'I don't like to brag, but I'm the guy who coined the phrase, 'Honey, I'm Home'.'

"Swing me with your words."

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

"Be or be not. There is no question."

I often thought that I should have been a weaver of words,someone who danced and sang his way into peoples souls and through my imagination led others into a world of dreams and intoxicating revelry...But auditing offered a much better pension.

Book publishing.

Accountant Manqué

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

Books vs mobile phones

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

Great Poets of Catalogdom

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

Will Self deprecation

Wordplay: Lemonade - Save the Lemon.

Rudyard Kipling

"He spends hours waiting for his muse to strike..."

Emily Dickinson

"It's about keeping the bunny alive within each of us."

'Ye gods, Will - art thou still monkeying about with that Ooh-ooh language?'

"Many editors take it improve their colons and semicolons."