Wordsmith Raconteur T-Shirts

"I can't believe my first published short story is about me."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Torturing the English Language

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Meet The Author"

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"She's been so creative lately."

First Novels.

"Do me next."

Edgar Allen Poe

Reading my Critics

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

Cut Price

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Backfire

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Someone who knows apostrophes

Why we need poetry. . .

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

What's normal?

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'