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'Have you had a lot of experience as a web designer?'

'I'm sorry, Mr Aaron, but we checked with your school and you only graduated first in your class alphabetically.'

The Knee-jerk reaction committee.

"Well, there goes the neighborhood."

Shingles Bar.

'Ideas that failed: A complete Set of Vowel Beams.'

'We have 90 words for snow. And 943 words for sex.'

"Nothing to be concerned about. Short-term memory foam loss is very common in a mattress your age."

"Do as I say, not as I dodo."

"You think you've been kicked-around a lot? Try being me for a day..."

Right to bare arms.

Carol singers at Anagram Company singing 'Listen Thing' instead of 'Silent Night'.

"Herbal Tea Party"

"Fancy going clubbing ?"

Jumpin' jehoshaphat!

'I'm a criminal lawyer.' 'I'm a criminal accountant.'

'You have a slice in your fairway, but you're out of the rough and doing about par.'

The Czech is in the mail....

"I didn't make the team...I guess I suck at everything."

'I guess it's true what they say: spirits just don't mix'

'Well you said you wanted to be a director!'

'Do you have the time?'

" I'm trying to produce a brick layer."

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

"For what it's worth, 'Yo-ho-ho and chilled Pinot Grigio' actually rhymes."

"Is there a letter 't'?"

"This is the hole that separates the women from the girls."

Dogs and Paper....a Complicated Relationship

"Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet... Wait, what the heck is a 'tuffet'?! Who says 'tuffet'? Shouldn't it be 'ottoman'?"

"Try taking up something you can do together… like fencing."

"Which do you believe more accurately describes the real you, … your 'Greatness' or your 'Whiteness'?"

"Early Bird, you need to go easy on the worms."

The buck stopped here

(formerly) Laughing Out Loud

"Good! They've started preparing them for those aptitude tests."