Wolf Pack Philosopher Pillows

"As an alpha-male, I get roasted online, but none of these anonymous trills challenge me in real life to take over and lead..."

Welcome to the Team

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

Future Tents

"Looting and plundering! Looting and plundering! There must be more to life!...."

"There's no need to howl at every moon we pass by."

Colin didn't really need a pocket-calculator...he already knew how many pockets he had!

Grass: We lost some good men today!

Fred began to understand why this kit house was so cheap.

"We found her wandering at the edge of the forest. She was raised by scientists."

"What should I say this is about?"

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Dept. de Philosophie

"Personally, this child would love to be 'left behind.'"

'Aw, come on guys - at the end of the day, it's only a game - right?'

"Every year, the zebras get faster and faster."

'Is he taking the piss?'

Goodnight Moon

"Trust your instinct son, not the rubbish spewed on Social Media..."

Bob knew his days as the alpha male were over: the challenger was using psychological warfare....

You Don't Know What It's Like

"You can't compete with a retired pharmacist."

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

Mobile Holmes.

Poet and Peasant

We know being raised by wolves isn't ideal, but think of the amazing essay you'll have on your college application!

'...and so I say without fear of contradiction...'

'What a beautiful landscape!'

"I want to apologize for some of the remarks I made during the heat of battle."

"OK, once again, for Bob's benefit: Hunting in a pack only works if everybody sticks to the plan!"

"Venal, narcissistic, power hungry politicians. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em."

He was raised by a pack of wolves, and the cleaning lady who came in twice a month.

"I have the after-dinner mints: we're all set to go hunting..."

Every pack has one, and in this pack, Butch was, without question, the afalfa male.