Witty Whisky Drinker Pillows

Beethoven's 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and Fifth.

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

"Touché"

Drive-thru Church

'Not only was the superbug immune to antibiotics, but it had developed a taste for Dr Jones' whisky.'

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

"We'd like to do a song that will barely penetrate your consciousness as you continue to enjoy those faddish cigars and single-malt scotches."

"Drinking improves my vodkabulary."

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

"I may be an aged whiskey, but inside I still feel like a fresh ear of corn!"

When Stupid People Get an Idea

"Is that neat whisky?"

Cold caller.

The Gilmore Girls

A lesson in wit

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'Yeah, but tomorrow I'll be sober, and you'll still be a giraffe!'

"You'll have to have it neat, sir. We're running out of ice."

You can kiss me later

"Your Honor, I would like the record to state that Mr. Katzman is a 'hostile witness'."

'It's a taste I think I can say I've acquired.'

'Water is a valuable good and we should use it sparingly. That's why I'd like my Scotch straight.'

"Tom, we've started a little office pool on how long it'll take me to get your job. Want in?"

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"He was 95. The doctors reckon it was either the bacon, the beer, the whiskey, the smoking, the wine, the steaks, the coffee, the butter, the biscuits or just too much sunshine that finally did him in."

"Scotch and water, *hic* scotch and water..."