Witty Dater Mugs

"He's a terrible drunk."

"Boy, your sister wasn't kidding when she said you were the face of the company."

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

Bangers and Mash

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

Crow and fox

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

Waterfall of Disappointment

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

'I understand you know how to treat a woman.'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

Jokes machine.

The Algonquin Round Table

"So, what is your star sign?"

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

Bat out of Hell

When Stupid People Get an Idea

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

The Gilmore Girls

Cold caller.

"Tell her I'm exercising my twenty-first amendment rights."

"Yes, it was 'love at first sight'. But, by the time I'd made my first opticians appointment we were already married."

'Fancy a good time - no strings attached?'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'I'd like an 'Innuendo' please - a big one.'

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

Quizzo tonight! Win a tee shirt! Trivia is my middle name, but I have all the tee shirts I need. So, tell me something: Are there Quizzo groupies?