Witty Conversation Appreciator T-Shirts

"Don't worry, he poses no danger. Whenever he approaches, I bring up the topic of politics. To him that's worse than hunger."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

"Touché"

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

Crow and fox

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

Jokes machine.

The Algonquin Round Table

'Mom can I have another apple?'

"So, what is your star sign?"

When Stupid People Get an Idea

The Gilmore Girls

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

Bat out of Hell

"I don't think you have a case. It's only slander if it's not true, and I've heard you play."

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

Cold caller.

"Tell her I'm exercising my twenty-first amendment rights."

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

"Your Honor, I would like the record to state that Mr. Katzman is a 'hostile witness'."

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"My previous patient thought he was a cruise missile."

'According to my Dad, bosses are just like headmasters. The only difference is that they give you money every month.'

"Tom, we've started a little office pool on how long it'll take me to get your job. Want in?"

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

"Try the fish. It's brain food"

'My favorite position? Chairperson of the Board.'

"I don't think you can claim that Martin Amis plaguerised your work just because you both used the words 'to','if' and 'but' on page 46."

'I preferred it before you started taking Prozac.'