Witty Commentary Fan T-Shirts

Businessman: 'I'm only paid enough to think inside the box.'

Surrealism Circle

'A cheeky red?'

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

Nature is going crazy! Extremely hot summers, tornadoes, floods. . .and now Frank comes home sober on a Friday evening at 10 PM!

A lady playing piano and a man talking to her

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

I break for toilet paper

'She's dealing multiple prescriptions. This is the 3rd pharmacy today where she got these highly addictive Chocolate Bits.'

"This guy looks like he's really out of touch."

"Remember - you have sharp teeth and claws, but he has sarcasm."

Alpha males through the ages!

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

'Twigs... great, that'll be comfortable.'

"She's genetically modified, you know."

'Nobody goes there any more.' - 'It's too crowded.'

"Is there a humorist in the house?"

The tree of liberty can survive only so much grafting.

"I hear you're something big in the city?"

Do you believe in money at first sight?

"It's true she's back to the same weight she was on her wedding day, but remember that she was 9 months pregnant with triplets then..."

"O.K., your mouth may be clean but I'll bet your mind is filthy."

People want as much government as they deserve.

"International Women's Day... When do men get their day?"

Bureaucrats Resting On Hercules Soldier.

People with anything valuable to say rarely become orators.

"I'm crossing the road to keep my social distance."

"Martha, are you sure you're not marrying me for money?"

QANON PROUD BOY

"They don’t seem to mind us — it's the humans they want to keep away."

"Well, it's only one glass after dinner darling!"

'you should know my wife thinks I'm stupid.'

"He's a good boy, but he sheds like crazy."