Wise Wordsmith Mugs

Lemonade and counsel

"I need a five letter word that starts with 'Ca'."

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"There's only one 'L' in colosseum."

I think you're ace

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

Best Seller

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

"He belongs to a lawyer."

Intellectual Foreplay...

Accountant Manqué

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

Shakespeare Ave

'You use the former when wooing your beloved and the latter during negotiations with your divorce lawyers.'

Novelist, writing her own vows... runs into writer's block.

Sharp Eyes

You trip on it, you buy it.

A bar selling 'crafty' beer is more popular than a bar selling 'craft' beer.

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"

'He never listened to his mother!'

A Poet

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

"He has to put a fiver in every time he says 'fiscal imperative' or 'target orientated processes'"

Bell Hop

Bagel problems.

"Wow, I cannot remember what I was saying."

'Unlike Wall Street, with its strict rules regulating insider trading, 'Love Street' remains un-regulated, and I'm pleases to let you know now, before the official announcement, that the position of Rolf Fusco's girlfriend is open.'